0648翻譯：十六年前的回憶（李星華）
0648翻譯：十六年前的回憶（李星華）
Translation： Memory from Sixteen Years Ago （Li Xinghua）
（translated by： alexcwlin； edited by： Adam Lam）
1927年4月28日，我永遠忘不了那一天。
April 28， 1927 is a date I can never forget。
那是父親的被難日，
That was the day when my father was tragically murdered。
離現在已經十六年了。
It was sixteen years ago from today。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
那年春天，父親每天夜裡回來得很晚。
In the spring of that year， Dad came home very late every night。
每天早晨，不知道什麼時候他又出去了。
Then who-knows-what-time every morning he went out again。
有時候他留在家裡，埋頭整理書籍和檔案。
Sometimes he stayed home fully occupied in sorting out books and documents。
我蹲在旁邊，看他把書和有字的紙片投到火爐裡去。
I squatted on one side and saw him throw books and papers with scribbles into the fireplace。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
我奇怪地問他∶“爹，為什麼要燒掉呢？
I asked him out of curiosity： “Dad， why are you burning them？
怪可惜的。”
What a pity！”
————————————————————————————————————————————————
待了一會兒，父親才回答∶“不要了就燒掉。
It was a while later before Dad answered： “You burn them when you don’t need them。
你小孩子家知道什麼！”
What does a little kid like you know？”
————————————————————————————————————————————————
父親是很慈祥的，從來沒罵過我們，更沒打過我們。
Dad was very kind and he never gave me a scolding or beating。
我總愛向父親問許多幼稚可笑的問題。
I always asked him many childish and ridiculous questions。
他不論多忙，對我的問題總是很感興趣，總是耐心地講給我聽。
No matter how busy he was， he always took interest in my questions and patiently explained things to me。
這一次不知道為什麼，父親竟這樣含糊地回答我。
This time I didn’t know for what reason Dad gave me such an ambiguous answer。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
後來聽母親說，軍閥張作霖要派人來檢查。
Later I heard my mother said Warlord Zhang Zuolin was sending people over to our home to check things out。
為了避免黨組織被破壞，父親只好把一些書籍和檔案燒掉。
To avoid harm to the Party， Dad had no choice but to burn some books and documents。
才過了兩天，果然出事了。
A couple of days later， disaster struck as expected。
工友閻振三一早上街買東西，直到夜裡還不見回來。
A worker Yan Zhensan went out to buy things early in the morning and he failed to return by the time it was late at night。
第二天，父親才知道他被抓到警察廳裡去了。
On the following day， Dad found out he was locked up in the police station。
我們心裡都很不安，為這位工友著急。
We felt very upset and were worried about this worker。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
局勢越來越嚴重，父親的工作也越來越緊張。
The situation quickly deteriorated and Dad‘s work was getting unsettling。
他的朋友勸他離開北京，母親也幾次勸他。
His friends tried to talk him into leaving Beijing and Mother did the same in several occasions。
父親堅決地對母親說∶“不是常對你說嗎？
Dad resolutely said to mother： “Haven’t I always told you？
我是不能輕易離開北京的。
I won’t leave Beijing so easily。
你要知道現在是什麼時候，這裡的工作多麼重要。
Do you know what a critical time it is and how important my work is right here？
我哪能離開呢？”
How could I just pack and leave？”
母親只好不再說什麼了。
So Mother did not say anything anymore。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
可怕的一天果然來了。
The unthinkable day finally came。
4月6日的早晨，妹妹換上了新夾衣，母親帶她到娛樂場去散步了。
In the morning of April 6th， my younger sister changed into a new cotton-lined dress and went out with Mother for a stroll in a recreation center。
父親在裡間屋裡寫字，我坐在外間的長木椅上看報。
Dad was writing something inside the house， and I was reading newspaper sitting on a bench outdoor。
短短的一段新聞還沒看完，就聽見啪，啪……幾聲尖銳的槍聲，接著是一陣紛亂的喊叫。
Before I could finish reading a short news article， I heard several loud gunshots “bang， bang， bang！” followed by frenzied clamoring。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
“什麼？爹！”我瞪著眼睛問父親。
“What’s going on， Dad？” I was wide-eyed in shock and asked Dad。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
“沒有什麼，
“It’s nothing。
不要怕。
Don’t be afraid。
星兒，跟我到外面看看去。”
Little Xing， follow me to take a look outside。”
————————————————————————————————————————————————
父親不慌不忙地從抽屜裡取出一把閃亮的小手槍，就向外走。
Dad unhurriedly took out a shiny little handgun from the drawer and went outside。
我緊跟在他身後，走出院子，
I followed closely behind him and walked out of the courtyard。
暫時躲在一間僻靜的小屋裡。
We temporarily hid inside a quiet little hut。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
一會兒，外面傳來一陣沉重的皮鞋聲。
After a short while， heavy footsteps from leather boots came from outside。
我的心劇烈地跳動起來，用恐怖的眼光瞅了瞅父親。
My heart almost jumped out of my mouth and I looked at Dad in fear。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
“不要放走一個！”
“Don’t let a single soul get away！”
窗外傳來粗暴的吼聲。
Rude barking broke out outside of the windows。
穿灰制服和長筒皮靴的憲兵，穿便衣的偵探，穿黑制服的警察，一擁而入，
Military police in gray uniforms and long boots， detectives in plain-clothes， and policemen in black uniforms barged in。
擠滿了這間小屋子。
They packed the little hut。
他們像一群魔鬼似的，把我們包圍起來。
Like a horde of devils they surrounded us。
他們每人拿著一把手槍，槍口對著父親和我。
Every one of them was holding a pistol aiming at Dad and me。
在軍警中間，我發現了前幾天被捕的工友閻振三。
Among them we found the worker Yan Zhensan who was apprehended a few days ago。
他的胳膊上拴著繩子，被一個肥胖的便衣偵探拉著。
His arms were fastened by ropes with the ends held by a fat plain-clothe detective。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
那個滿臉橫肉的便衣偵探指著父親問閻振三∶“你認識他嗎？”
The mean-looking plain-clothe detective pointed at Dad and asked Yan Zhensan： “Do you know him？”
————————————————————————————————————————————————
閻振三搖了搖頭。他那披散的長頭髮中間露出一張蒼白的臉，
Yan Zhensan shook his head and a pale face was shown through his unkempt long hair。
顯然是受過苦刑了。
Evidently he had been tortured。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
“哼！你不認識？
“Well， you don’t know him？
我可認識他。”
But I do。”
偵探冷笑著，又吩咐他手下的那一夥，“看好，別讓他自殺，
The detective grinned and ordered his men， “Watch him closely and don’t let him commit suicide。
先把手槍奪過來！”
Take away his pistol first。”
————————————————————————————————————————————————
他們奪下了父親的手槍，把父親全身搜了一遍。
They snatched away the pistol from Dad and searched his body。
父親保持著他那慣有的嚴峻態度，沒有向他們講任何道理。
Dad maintained his usual stern demeanor and did not attempt to argue with them。
因為他明白，對他們是沒有道理可講的。
He knew too well he could not reason with them。
殘暴的匪徒把父親綁起來，拖走了。
Those ruthless bandits tied up Dad and dragged him away。
我也被他們帶走了。
They took me away as well。
在高高的磚牆圍起來的警察廳的院子裡，我看見母親和妹妹也都被帶來了。
In the courtyard of the police station enclosed by high walls， I saw Mother and my younger sister were brought in as well。
我們被關在女拘留所裡。
We were locked up in a female detention room。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
十幾天過去了，我們始終沒看見父親。
Ten and some days had gone by and throughout those times we did not see Dad。
有一天，我們正在吃中飯，手裡的窩窩頭還沒啃完，聽見警察喊我們母女的名字，
One day we were having lunch and before we could finish munching the steamed corn bread in our hands， we heard our names called by the police。
說是提審。
They said a trial was going to be held in court。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
在法庭上，我們跟父親見了面。
In the courtroom we saw Dad。
父親仍舊穿著他那件灰布舊棉袍，
He was still wearing the same gray， old， cotton-padded gown。
可是沒戴眼鏡。
But he was not wearing his pair of eyeglasses。
我看到了他那亂蓬蓬的長頭髮下面的平靜而慈祥的臉。
I saw his calm and kind face under his messy， long hair。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
“爹！”
“Dad！”
我忍不住喊出聲來。
I could not contain myself and shouted out loud。
母親哭了，妹妹也跟著哭起來了。
Mother broke out in tears and so did my younger sister。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
“不許亂喊！”
“No shouting！”
法官拿起驚堂木重重地在桌子上拍了一下。
The judge picked up his gavel and slammed it down hard on the desk once。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
父親瞅了瞅我們，沒對我們說一句話。
Dad gave us a glance but did not utter a word to us。
他臉上的表情非常安定，非常沉著。
The expression on his face was very calm and composed。
他的心被一種偉大的力量佔據著。這個力量就是他平日對我們講的——他對於革命事業的信心。
His heart was filled with an exalted strength， which was what he regularly told us—his faith in the movement of revolution。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
“這是我的妻子。”他指著母親說。接著他又指了一下我和妹妹，“這是我的兩個女孩子。”
“This is my wife，” he pointed to Mother， and then he pointed to my sister and me， “these are my two daughters。”
————————————————————————————————————————————————
“她是你最大的孩子嗎？”
“Is she your eldest child？”
法官指著我問父親。
The judge pointed at me and asked Dad。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
“是的，我是最大的。”我怕父親說出哥哥來，就這樣搶著說了。
“Yes， I am the eldest，” I was concerned Dad could reveal my older brother and so I interrupted to speak。
我不知道當時哪裡來的機智和勇敢。
I had no idea where I got the quick-wit and courage from。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
“不要多嘴！”
“Don’t butt in。”
法官怒氣衝衝的，又拿起他面前那塊木板狠狠地拍了幾下。
The judge was steaming mad and once again picked up his gavel and slammed down hard a few times。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
父親立刻就會意了，接著說∶“她是我最大的孩子。
Dad immediately got the message and said after me： “She is my oldest child。
我的妻子是個鄉下人。我的孩子年紀都還小，
My wife is a country folk and my children are still small。
她們什麼也不懂。一切都跟她們沒有關係。”
They don’t know anything and they have nothing to do with all these。”
父親說完了這段話，又望了望我們。
After making the statement， Dad looked at us again。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
法官命令把我們押下去。
The judge ordered to put us back into custody。
我們就這樣跟父親見了一面，匆匆分別了。想不到這竟是我們最後的一次見面。
Just like that we saw Dad briefly but we never would have thought that was the last time we saw one another。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
28日黃昏，警察叫我們收拾行李出拘留所。
In the evening of the 28th， the police told us to pack our belongings and released us from detention。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
我們回到家裡，天已經全黑了。
When we came home， it was already dark。
第二天，舅姥爺到街上去買報。
The next day my uncle went out to buy a newspaper。
他是從街上哭著回來的，手裡無力地握著一份報。
He came home with tears in his eyes and a newspaper in his hand。
我看到報上用頭號字登著“李大釗等昨已執行絞刑”，立刻感到眼前蒙了一團雲霧，昏倒在床上了。
In reading the words in bold on the paper which stated “Yesterday Li Dazhao was executed by hanging”， I blacked out and collapsed on my bed。
母親傷心過度，昏過去三次，
Mother was overwhelmed with sorrow and passed out three times。
每次都是剛剛叫醒又昏過去了。
Every time she fainted again right after she had come to。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
過了好半天，母親醒過來了，
After a good half day， Mother regained consciousness。
她低聲問我∶“昨天是幾號？
She asked me in a low voice： “What date was yesterday？
記住，昨天是你爹被害的日子。”
Remember yesterday was the day when your father was murdered。”
————————————————————————————————————————————————
我又哭了，
I cried again。
從地上撿起那張報紙，咬緊牙，又勉強看了一遍。
Then I picked up the newspaper from the floor， bit my lip and forced myself to read it once over again。
我低聲對母親說∶“媽，昨天是4月28日。”
I said to my mother in a low voice， “Mom， yesterday was April 28th。”
母親微微點了一下頭。
Mother nodded slightly。
————————————————————————————————————————————————
